I was recently in a meeting with a bride where this discussion came up. Which was better head table or sweetheart table? Well, those of you that know me know I voted sweetheart table. I know there are people out there who are strong believers in the head table and it has been a staple of the reception for years and years (which is one of the reasons I don’t like it, soooooo dated).
So to check and make sure my feelings where correct on the issue (gasp, could I possibly be wrong), I took the question to one of the wedding boards I belong to. Now, this is not just any group of wedding planners, their membership includes some of the most popular ones in the nation. If you watch the wedding shows, such as Whose Wedding is it Anyway, you have seen some of the members in action. So I posed the question, “Which do you prefer, head table or sweetheart table and why?”
The vote was overwhelmingly Sweetheart Table. The reasons were:
Head tables are antiquated.
If the head table is only the wedding party, all the significant others end up at a table alone or if they allow SO’s then and I quote “it begins to look like the last supper with "fifty-eleven" people sitting at one table” (I love that…lol)
Sweetheart tables are like eye candy to a design scheme.
Head tables tend to look pompous.
Sweetheart tables keep the bride and groom the center of attention. (which can be good or bad depending on the couple and what kind of attention they enjoy)
Sweetheart table gives the couple more intimate moments at the reception. They are usually sitting angled, so they can see each other and talk to each other, rather than seated side by side at a head table.
The only negatives were:
They are separated from everyone
Guest tend to walk over and talk to them rather than letting them eat. (I solved this problem by having some of my group stand near the couple, giving them time to eat. Guest tend not to approach them if we are standing there. We don’t run them off; it’s just a visual thing, which allows the couple a few minutes to get to eat.)
Just something to think about.
So to check and make sure my feelings where correct on the issue (gasp, could I possibly be wrong), I took the question to one of the wedding boards I belong to. Now, this is not just any group of wedding planners, their membership includes some of the most popular ones in the nation. If you watch the wedding shows, such as Whose Wedding is it Anyway, you have seen some of the members in action. So I posed the question, “Which do you prefer, head table or sweetheart table and why?”
The vote was overwhelmingly Sweetheart Table. The reasons were:
Head tables are antiquated.
If the head table is only the wedding party, all the significant others end up at a table alone or if they allow SO’s then and I quote “it begins to look like the last supper with "fifty-eleven" people sitting at one table” (I love that…lol)
Sweetheart tables are like eye candy to a design scheme.
Head tables tend to look pompous.
Sweetheart tables keep the bride and groom the center of attention. (which can be good or bad depending on the couple and what kind of attention they enjoy)
Sweetheart table gives the couple more intimate moments at the reception. They are usually sitting angled, so they can see each other and talk to each other, rather than seated side by side at a head table.
The only negatives were:
They are separated from everyone
Guest tend to walk over and talk to them rather than letting them eat. (I solved this problem by having some of my group stand near the couple, giving them time to eat. Guest tend not to approach them if we are standing there. We don’t run them off; it’s just a visual thing, which allows the couple a few minutes to get to eat.)
Just something to think about.
4 comments:
I just did a google search for head table vs. sweetheart table and I'm glad your page popped in my results, I think I will have to send my mother the link to your page...also I will now be checking this page often (if you don't mind). Thanks for the idea
I'm all for the sweetheart tables. Doing the old school long head table is, like I said, old school. Plus, with the type of decoration I like to do, a sweetheart table is really more preferable.
I've also run into some places that do a sweetheart table in the middle of a long table...then they connect the table skirts. Oy.
I was just sent your link from my Fiance. As the Guy I have a question on this. In my case, I am one of thoese people that DONT like the attention. Now I know that as the Groom, I will get attention, but I feel with a sweatheart table people stare. Its the feeling you get if you have stage fright. I feel with a head table I can "hide" among the other people there. My Fiance wants the Sweetheart table. is there a middle ground ?
Hi Walter,
As a person that doesn't like to be the center of attention either I totally understand your problem. To answer your question, yes there is a middle ground. Many times we have taken one of the guest tables and placed the bride, groom, both sets of parents and the minister and his wife at this special table. The surrounding tables can be filled with your wedding party if you like. To make the bride and groom stand out just a tad from everyone else, we place flowers on the back of their chairs. Usually we can take a pew marker arrangement and easily attach to the back of their chairs saving some money in the process. Also make the table arrangement on this table a little larger or different from the rest. I think this would work well for you. It is a much more modern and upscale look than the headtable.
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