I'm Engaged! What Next?

Photo by Jason Tench, Blue Mountain Photo Works

Since this is the time of year that so many girls receive their engagement ring, I thought we might talk about what happens after the parents and friends are told, and the excitment dies down a little. Just where do you start with planning your wedding? What happens next?

So many times I hear from brides, I just got engaged, bought my dress and have a reception site picked. What should I do next? Ok, there are several things wrong with this statement. After he slides that ring on your finger and you have informed all the family members of the upcoming event, the next thing you do NOT do is go out and buy the dress or pick a reception site.

Let me explain. First things first, ask those people that are most important to you to be in your wedding party. Discuss possible dates you have chosen with them and see if one of these dates will work with everyone. You don’t want to already have your date chosen and then find out your very best friend in the world is not going to be available on that date to be your maid of honor. (Side note: Be sure you are picking people for your wedding party that you can rely on and trust to do the things that need to be done.) Remember the bigger the wedding party the higher the cost.  I always remind brides, that the more attendants you have, the higher your flower budget. All those bouquets, corsages and boutonnières are not cheap.

After finding a date that will work, then start on a guest list. The number of guests you plan to invite affects everything, the size site you can use, the amount you will have to spend on food and alcohol, even down to the cost of ordering and mailing invitations. The more guests the higher your expense. If really good food, good flowers and alcohol are important to you, watch that list closely. Cost per guest adds up really quickly. I have many a bride that wanted a particular site only to figure out that it will not hold the amount of guests she wants to invite or is too expensive once everything is added up. It would be a tragedy, if they had already paid a large deposit and then figured this out.

After you have a good estimate on the number of guests you want to invite, and a site picked, then you start searching for your dress. The dress needs to reflect the formality or informality of the site. You don't want a ball gown if you are getting married in a barn. The colors at the site may also affect the choice you need to make in colors of your dress and the bridesmaids’ dresses.   Also, at this point you will have a better budget idea of what you can spend on your dress. Many brides have learned too late, that they spent a large portion of the budget on the dress and now can’t afford the extras they dreamed of having.

The florist will need to see color samples or pictures of the dress and bridesmaid dress before he or she can help you decide on flowers. The baker will need to know how many guests, what the site looks like and details from your dress to help you decide on the perfect cake.

And one more important note, plan ahead, way ahead of the date you want to be married. The best sites and vendors in Greenville book a year or more in advance in most cases.

So as you can see, to have a beautiful, affordable wedding, you have to understand how all your choices affect each other and this is something that your wedding planner can help you understand.

How Weather Can Affect Your Wedding - The Need For a Plan B

Our surprise white Christmas got me thinking that this might be  a good time to discuss again how bad weather can change your wedding plans. As soon as a bride tells me she is planning an outdoor wedding, my first question has to be “what is your plan B?” I’m amazed how many people haven’t even considered one, much less done the ground work for planning one. I know you don’t want to consider rain or snow on your wedding day, but you better. Not a year has gone by since I started doing weddings that we haven’t had to move an outdoor wedding inside due to the weather.

It being winter right now, you’re probably not planning an outdoor wedding, but that doesn’t mean the weather can not affect your wedding. All it takes is a good ice storm, or snow, to really change your plans. What would you do if ice knocked your power out? Maybe stock up on candles and be ready to have a candlelight ceremony. Why not stock up on extra wraps for your guests in case there is a loss of heat at the ceremony or reception site. Always have extra umbrellas on hand incase rain suddenly strikes as guests are entering or leaving your wedding. We have boxes full of umbrellas that we have loaned to guests at more than one wedding. Most importantly, have a plan in place for contacting your guests to let them know if the weather causes any changes or delays on your wedding day.

As much as you hope and pray for good weather on your wedding day, it is so important to have a plan B in place. Even if you never use it, you will be so less stressed just knowing it’s there.

Having the Wedding You Want at a Price You Can Afford

Dessert Receptions are a great way to save money

Saving money in today’s world is tough and getting tougher by the gas tank. Saving money on your wedding is no small challenge, but it can be done. Early in the game decide what is important to you and just where you want to spend your hard earned dollars. Make a plan and stick to it. Too many brides and grooms get distracted with the “bling” as they start their planning. If you have a firm budget in mind and an eye on your priorities it will certainly make things easier for you.


Keep in mind that your reception alone will probably account for 50% of your budget (at least) with the other 50% covering your flowers, dress, invitation and everything else that is not food or alcohol. So remember your guest list is the key factor in saving money.  More guests means more money going out the door.  The more guests, not only the more food and alcohol but the more tables, chairs, linens, centerpieces and favors.  So keep the guest list manageable.

When meeting with vendors, never be afraid to start the conversation, with “this is what I hope to spend” and give them a dollar amount. You will save you and your vendor a lot of time and effort if you are upfront and straight with them about your budget. Contrary to what a lot of magazines and forums would have you believe the majority of vendors (at least in my experience) are not out to “get you”. They want to work with you and provided an event that works budget wise for both you and them. Most vendors will have excellent ideas for giving you the most for your dollars or if your budget won’t work with them, they will tell you and you can move on.

Flexibility is another money saving advantage. Can you get married on a Friday or Sunday, instead of Saturday? Most event sites offer discounts for weddings not on Saturday. Same goes for the time of day. If you can go with a morning or afternoon wedding, there are savings available not only for your event space, but in your menu. A midmorning brunch or late afternoon cake and dessert reception can be very elegant but cost a great deal less.

Be flexible with your dates too. Weddings held April through September, in the upstate area, are going to be popular dates causing vendors to be less eager to do any negotiation. Pick a date September through March and you will have a much better selection of vendors at more affordable prices. That being said, avoid your holidays such as Christmas and Valentines, since some vendors charge premiums for holidays.

I know you have heard this before but, your alcohol bill will eat up a large portion of your budget, so be flexible here too. Offer your guests beer and wine, one or two signature cocktails and skip the open bar. No one will be offended and you will save a lot. I’m not a fan of the cash bar; you do not invite guests to your home and then charge them for a drink. The same should be true of your wedding. Offer the guests what you can afford. If you have to, go with hosting beer and wine, and making alcohol only cash. Just make sure your guests are aware ahead of time, so they bring money with them. Be sure to place a sign on the bar stating what you are doing. And skip the champagne toast; it is nothing but wasted money. We have seen it over and over again, full glasses or half empty bottles left on the tables. Let your guests toast with whatever they are drinking. No one will complain.

Save money on your flower budget. There is always the option of doing the flowers yourself, but unless you are a florist or work for a florist, this is a recipe for disaster. I’ve seen it go wrong too many times. Instead, hire the florist but do things like skip the pew markers in the church, or mark only the family section. Reuse bridesmaids’ bouquets on guest tables or cocktail tables. Bring your arrangements from the church to the reception (if your church approves). They can easily be slipped into the reception area during the cocktail hour without guests even being aware. You may have to pay a small delivery fee to your florist, but it’s a lot less than a buying a new arrangement. Again, be upfront with your florist about what you want to spend and let him tell you what will give you the most bang for your buck. Be flexible.

Candles can be affordable alternatives to large floral centerpieces.

Candles can make great centerpieces, just check with the rules of your site and see what they allow. Simple flowers in a glass vase can give a very modern vibe to your event but at the same time be very cost effective. And speaking of sites, see what your reception venue has to offer in the way of centerpieces. Your florist can take the simple hurricane lamp your site may include for free, add a few flowers and turn it into something amazing.

Save on invitations, find dealers who offer discounts or buy the kits available in stores and print them yourselves. Search online for printable invitations or make your own from scratch. Do your own addressing or print with a calligraphy font on your computer (straight on to the envelope, not onto a label). Be creative, something your guests will appreciate more than expensive typeset and heavy papers. If you are just not the creative type, shop around and order the traditional invitation without all the bells and whistles. I hate to say it, but they are eventually going to end up in the trash anyway. No one but you and your Mom are going to save them.

Print programs and menus yourself. There are tons of ideas and templates available on the web. Pick a nice paper stock and do it yourself. It’s cheaper and adds your personal touch to the items.

Skip the costly picture frame and key chain favors and go with something to eat. Candy or cookies are inexpensive and guest will not leave them behind.

Candy favors are always a good way to go

 These are only a few of the money saving ideas, you and your planner can use to make your dream wedding affordable. I know its tough having to make hard decisions about your wedding. But if you are smart about the decisions you make, you can still have the wedding of your dreams or one close to it, even in this expensive world.

Don't Be Late

While talking to a group of people today, I discovered that not everyone understands what exactly the time on a wedding invitation means. When you get an invitation in the mail to a regular party, let’s say a Christmas event, and the time says 6:30, everyone knows that means the party starts at 6:30. So you don’t arrive before 6:30. In fact a little later than 6:30 is totally acceptable.

Things are a little different with a wedding invitation. When a wedding invitation states 6:00 as the time of the wedding, this means the bride will walk down the aisle at 6:00 on the dot. All the mothers, groomsmen, bridesmaids, etc., will already be down the aisle. If you arrive at 6:00, you are late! Guest should arrive thirty minutes before the start of the ceremony. So you should be arriving at 5:30. Anything later and you risk walking in as part of the processional. Ok, not really, you will be held at the back of the church and only seated in the back once the bride is down the aisle.

So the rule is, for weddings always arrive 30 minutes before the time on the invitation.

The New Color For 2011 Weddings

Are you in the thick of planning your 2011 wedding? Are you wondering what the “the color” for next year will be and how you can incorporate it into your wedding? Well the color experts at Pantone that make these kinds of decisions have declared that Honeysuckle Pink will be the color of choice.

Pantone said that the reddish pink color is a “captivating, stimulating color that gets the adrenaline going”. It is a color that looks good on most anyone and goes well with a lot of colors.

So what do you think? Is this the color that works for your wedding?

Sugar and Champagne

One of the things I really enjoy about the Christmas season is going to the open houses put on by some of our talented vendors. Today, I was lucky enough to able to attend Dahlia’s Sugar and Champagne Design Event. Kristi is so talented that I knew it would be both beautiful and different from your usual Christmas décor and I was not disappointed. Not only did we see some gorgeous things, I saw some great ideas that could be incorporated into wedding design.

We snapped a few pictures with the cell phone to share with you.

This is not a great picture of this, but believe me it was simple and wonderful.  What a great centerpiece idea if you are planning a event at a place like Zen.



This was my favorite.  It was sooooooo beautiful.  I want it at my house.

Kristi hard at work, showing off all her hard work.